“We Are The Experts”
– Excerpt of “Smoking, Who?
To Quit Smoking,
Belittle Smoking”
WE ARE THE EXPERTS
(This short chapter, like most of the book, was written during the pandemic, so you will see a few references to COVID-19; still worth mentioning regardless of the calendar year since smokers & vapers are more sensitive to respiratory issues compared to non-smokers & non-vapers.)
I wrote Smoking, Who? starting from the idea that anyone can quit. Not everyone who tries to will succeed, yet quitting can in theory be accomplished. If I didn’t think that, I wouldn’t have written this text. I wouldn’t compose a choir segment for the mute, however, a book about ceasing smoking I would and I did because I have confidence in the effectiveness of breaking up with this offender. We are endowed with the mental means to surpass this addiction, and in this book I am praising this side that we all have. I am reminding you why you can do it, and that it is very important to believe in yourself.
“Quitting smoking should be as common as starting smoking.” I’ve once been called delusional for saying this — by a person who doesn’t trust that the power and the clarity exist in people — but that stance may be a reflection of his view on world, so I ignored him and I kept my dream. I know it can be true because I am a quitter. Others may consider this a utopia, yet meantime we just went through a pandemic ordeal! Thus I dare to think that good dreams can also become reality. Otherwise the next nightmare will be taking over, presenting itself as a skyrocketing increase in the number of the smoking related victims, as anticipated by the World Health Organization[i].
I quit, and then I wrote this book! If everyone would feel some of my enthusiasm, the future would be less grim and smoking wouldn’t be so popular, but I have hope; you only got to page 19. Plus, 2020 showed that humans can individually do an effort, like social distancing is, and that we can synchronize with our peers around the globe, as it happened during the lockdowns in most of March, April and in early May. This is a screenplay type of situation that would have sounded equally delusional a few years ago, and I am only using it as an indicator that our limits are not rigid — a great point to remember when we doubt our capabilities of succeeding!
Meanwhile, not everyone agreed with the gravity of the virus or with the recommendations, so in the end it is all about what we want to do versus what we do not want to do. These two are more proof of how powerful our personal preferences are, and represent another aspect we should not forget when planning to quit cigarettes — regardless of what direction we decide to go, our will and drive will be as strong as our opinion.
Before the coronavirus was ‘a thing,’ smoking was the largest epidemic, and will still be massive, therefore I don’t find it absurd to discuss maintaining the health that we were gifted, opposed to clogged lungs, to tumors and to the premature death caused by inhaling toxins. This objective is pertinent not only because we need it, but also because we have what it takes to deliver it — both one by one, and as a race.
In order to get started, let’s focus on yourself; imagine that one hundred persons went inside one hundred identical rooms, and you are one of them. The doors are now locked behind you all, so you are stranded. However, each key is on an upper shelf. The only modality to leave is to grab it, and you are free to do whatever you can. Some are tall enough, while others will be standing on the tips of their toes, some will stretch an arm or will step on a ladder, some will jump to get it, others will climb on a piece of furniture or push a chair and use that to pull themselves up. This is how I feel about ending smoking. Please try looking through my lens; since you got into it, you will get out, just like you’ll be exiting that space.
Yet, some will sit on the couch and they’ll cry, assuming they are trapped! Don’t live in fear or in denial, instead take the lead : deal with this, search for the key because you will find it if you listen to your mind and to your intuition. Like everything else in life, putting your hands on that key and quitting smoking — follow logic and determination, and require faith.
To get to the key you were inventive, to quit you must reinvent yourself as the original version: the non-smoker. The best news is that not only have you grown up as that person, but that person also resides in you! (More about this throughout the book.)
*
Up to this moment we don’t know enough about the novel coronavirus, and while some look for hidden meanings behind it, everyone is aware of the tragic consequences smoking has on their health. However, quite a few are still doing it! With or without Covid-19, smoking was always a killer epidemic, so contagious that it has spread to over one billion users, and it keeps growing. If you are into hot topics, this is so hot that it has been smoldering and burning for decades:
- 14,000 persons die daily due to it globally[ii],
- Thousands light their first cigarette every 24 hours[iii],
- Yet far less quit.
To me, the disparity between these numbers is scary, telling us that:
- It is easy to become an addict,
- Giving up smoking is accepted as difficult,
- Meanwhile, it looks like deciding to do it is the hardest part.
Studies show that most of the smokers want to end this relation, but this depends on how determined they are. Do they really mean it? I occasionally state that I would jog, yet you never see me running. (It’s not that I am too fast for the eyes, it is just not happening!)
How badly do we wish to do certain things, and how much do we trust our words? I know I’ll never sprint unless I have to catch a bus, a train, an airplane, or if someone’s chasing me with loaded guns, pointy swords and a short temper.
My point is that there is one inanimate felon who does this to us on a regular basis, as a metaphor: the habituality of smoking, only that instead of leaving it behind, we have allowed it to become our shadow. It is the shadow of the smoker’s thinking, therefore, by mending our spirit, we could get rid of this behavior similarly to the way we naturally shed what is no longer needed — like the dead skin cells, the baby teeth and the old hair.
Starting to smoke is usually associated with something pleasant, like hanging out with friends when you were a youngster, and so stays the way we perceive this vice years after: an escape. On the other hand, quitting is associated with saying “No” to oneself.
The intriguing part is that life taught us that we can take “No” for an answer in so many circumstances. We should look at this as being fully trained, since we accept it from parents, friends, teachers, bosses, authorities, relatives, partners, strangers, ex-lovers, neighbors — yet we are afraid to discipline ourselves.
We also say “No” to everyone else almost every day. We don’t respond to emails, messages, we don’t call back, we don’t give a hand; voluntarily or not, we are aces at ignoring each other’s needs. Since we truly are pros at giving and receiving any form of negation, quitting smoking is our opportunity to finally offer this “skill” an entirely good connotation! I once wrote:
“I can easily snooze with my eyes shut
From seven to nine.
I say I’m overqualified.”
This almost makes sense, and so does our incapacity of saying “No” to the cigarettes — it almost makes sense. Our reaction stands as right for only about two seconds, until we think of the big picture: we drop and we hear “No” so many times that “No” could be part of our names. (Check out mine!)
“No” is in our nature, in fact we are The No-Experts! If surviving “No” was an academy, then we would all graduate Magna Cum Laude by eleven. I hence believe that we can all refuse ourselves the cigarettes.
And if the smoking affair wouldn’t be a life and death matter, it would be a fascinating diversion due to the simplicity, the extent and the evilness — probably good for a video gamer who loves internal conflicts and fictional dead bodies piling up. But the reality makes it a silent war, ravaging, alarming and sick. It has all the ingredients for a conspiracy theory, only that it is in our face. No secret about it. Smoking kills and it is the culprit for 100 million deaths[iv] in the 20th century, while one billion casualties are expected this century (could be your kids’ kids) if nothing changes in our behavior and in our understanding individually and as a group. So, let’s think this through!
While reflecting over my very own situation, I realized that my entire smoking career owed everything to the fact that I did not have appropriate conversations, even with myself. I used to hide behind half empty packs, ignoring that quitting was attainable. However, tips on how to achieve your dream of giving up smoking for good can be found throughout this text, because this is the right dialogue. Accept your duality. Quitting is hard until you recognize that your mind was hijacked. The tobacco addict became an intruder, always loud and unreliable, so if you desire nicotine-freedom, begin the eviction program. ‘Occupy’ your mind, because just like you want to quit, your smoker side doesn’t want to.
WHO IS THIS FOR?
This is for anyone thirsty to absorb smoking-related information using the intimate tone of their voice. Silence the videos, the clatter of the forums, the unrelated discussions, the panic and the noise.
I was told that nobody reads anymore. In a loud world of clashing thoughts, place everything else around you on mute for a few precious moments. Connect with yourself. What does smoking offer you that is so good? In what ways does a cloud of smoke overpower or disarm you? If you ask me, I will tell you that there aren’t many. You are hard to break and you are complex, like a diamond ¨ with multiple facets. You are truly gifted while the smoke has only two ‘talents’: it hurts you and it can shorten your lifespan!
It’s okay to stop and assess. Between you and the smoke, you are the only asset. Start fresh. Push yourself through the finish line, as if you were cheering for your son or daughter, or for you as a child.
The problem is that we read too much these days: articles, books, social media posts, comments, updates, emails, messages, tag lines, blogs, headlines, breaking news or ads. The data is huge, diverse and it keeps coming. We are overly distracted. We know that we should love ourselves, but we forgot what we are supposed to do in order to live by that. This, here, is your reminder. When you put your ducks in a row, everything will make sense, and the transition back to the non-smoker self (or non-vaper self) will be smoother than expected.
Unlike some of the books written to guide you towards a palpable shift in your lifestyle, this one will stay on the light side. It won’t tell you to wake up at the crack of dawn, then to jog five miles followed by an ice-cold bath. This is centered around doing nothing, because when you quit smoking you are only eliminating an activity.
However, this “nothingness” is not hollow. It is as significant as that one second which moves the hands of the clock from today’s date to tomorrow. One day in March it was April, one day in May it was June, but smoking can crush that[1]. Cigarettes don’t offer free passes from death, not even on World No Tobacco Day[2].
No matter how comfortable you feel right now, remember, smoking is extremely tricky and consistent in that it will end up killing thousands from 7 a.m. today until 7 a.m. tomorrow. Therefore, when you part ways with it you also protect the ones who care about you (dogs and cats included), so they won’t suffer. Love equals happiness, as much as it equals sorrow. I don’t wish on anyone to measure any kind of love in tears. On the contrary, I want the affection associated with you to be a constant reality over many of the coming years!
In other words, quitting smoking is all about stretching time. Instead of sand grains, your hourglass will gain seconds. They’ll fit like a key in a door or like a cube in a Tetris game taking you to the next level, because when you quit smoking, you win at life.
[1] Read this as “One day in May it became June,” to suggest the passage of time, and the fact that we take it for granted. It may seem like a cycle, but only until it ends. We all know it; for each living being, time is a string — and strings break. (As mortals we are given just a slice, not the whole cake.)
[2] The World No Tobacco Day is observed each year on May 31st. 14,000 still pass away on that day due to tobacco.
[i] Cropley, Ed “Smoking could kill 1 billion this century: WHO”, Reuters, 2 July 2007
<www.reuters.com/article/us-smoking/smoking-could-kill-1-billion-this-century-who-idUSBKK25206020070702> Accessed 5 November 2019
[ii] “Smoking kills 14,000 people every day in the world: Tobacco – a threat to development”, World Health Organization, 15 June 2017
<www.afro.who.int/news/smoking-kills-14000-people-every-day-world-tobacco-treat-development> Accessed 15 November 2019
[iii] “Smoking and tobacco use – Fast Facts – Cigarette Smoking in the US” par.2, Center for Disease Control and Prevention, 21 May 2020
<www.cdc.gov/tobacco/data_statistics/fact_sheets/fast_facts/index.htm> Accessed 25 June 2020
[iv] Ritchie, Hannah and Roser, Max “Smoking” par. 2, Our World In Data, revised in November 2019
<https://ourworldindata.org/smoking> Accessed 14 December 2019
[v]
Hitti, Miranda “1 Billion Tobacco Deaths This Century?” Web MD, 07 February 2008
<www.webmd.com/smoking-cessation/news/20080207/1-billion-tobacco-deaths-this-century> Accessed 15 November 2019
